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Responses, Results and Reactions

RESPONSES:

I apologize for holding off on the posting of the response and reaction section.  I have received so many letters and messages, that I simply decided to wait until the bulk of the mail came in.  I will try to answer everyone’s questions as best as possible, and I am sorry for not mentioning everybody’s specific name.  There are, however, a few people whose letters I wish to talk about distinctively.

Here is the breakdown everybody is on their toes waiting for.  I’ve received a total of 60 letters and messages:  10 of them have come from individuals who have gone to or are currently attending Hofstra University, 4 of them from SUNY at Purchase Alumni, and 44 of them are from people who have graduated from Hendrick Hudson High School.  I know, that only adds up to 58, but I received 2 responses from individuals with disabilities that I am yet to meet.

The first order of business is to simply thank everyone for their interest in my story.  I’m overwhelmed by the number of people who have wished me well, sent me their questions, and shared their various reactions to the first part in my series of articles.

Most common questions and reactions:  The bulk of the mail came from people who wished me well and asked how I am currently doing.  They also asked if I will be writing subsequent articles to follow up on ‘Part I.’

My response and answers:  Again, I thank everyone for wishing me well.  It REALLY helps anybody, but especially someone with a disability, when they know that people care.  Countless numbers of individuals with disabilities suffer from depression.  The suicide rate amongst people who have suffered spinal cord injuries is five times as high as it is for the general population.  Many of whom never get the support from friends and family that I am so fortunate to receive.  The only piece of advice I can give to each and every one of you, is to not turn away from the person in the wheelchair just because he or she may seem a little different on the outside.  Inside, they react the same way a non-disabled person would to a shrug.  Just think of me and remember that I am still here, in no small part due to the close friends and family, and more distant friends who have shown me so much love throughout the years.  The people who read my story here on “A Letter a Week” included.

My current situation is fine.  Obviously, there has not been a cure for spinal cord injuries, so I am still a paraplegic from the waist down.  One of the neat things about seeing Christopher Reeve a few times was knowing he was trying so hard to push for a cure.  We’ve unfortunately lost him and his wife recently, but the scientific community around the world has coordinated their efforts in large part due to the Reeves’ urging and campaigning.

My hearing impairment still exists.  It’s funny, but I can lip read with some success;  however, as any one who knows me will tell you, the words puck, duck, luck, and truck are often misread by me and turned into an “explicative.”  Yes, you can laugh, for even I can’t get over how after a dozen years I still haven’t learned to lip read those words correctly.

Yes, I am writing a series of stories for “A Letter a Week.”  The next one will be out sometime soon, and will allow everyone to see the ordeal from the vantage point of family and friends.  They have some crazy stories to tell about the initial night I spent in Nassau County Medical Center, as well as snippets regarding the subsequent 1 ½ years I spent in the hospital.  A few will talk about how they see my current situation.  The third part of the series will explore the point of view from the doctors, nurses, therapists, and other medical professionals who treated me during my years in the hospital.  The final part will talk about how I am trying to get various celebrities involved in raising money for people with spinal cord injuries and other disabilities.  I am hoping to accomplish all of this with Scott Riecke, the founder of the A Letter a Week Project.  It should be an interesting endeavor.

By the way, everyone loved the introduction by Scott.  He’s quite a writer, and it was his idea to write this series.  A lot of you have pointed out Scott’s wonderful writing ability.  I’ve been quite impressed myself; great job Scott!

Reaction and response from Ted Leshinski:   ….I had absolutely no idea about your accident.  I read your post on Scott’s “A Letter a Week” website, and was truly blown away.  That’s truly a remarkable story.

You know, when I was in college I did a lot of partying.  And I sometimes think, now and then, how lucky I am that nothing serious ever happened to me as a result.  I think many people in college drink a lot and party pretty hard, so every once in a while there is a serious accident because of it.

So reading your story really hit home.  I’m sorry that it happened to you….

(and in a second correspondence) …. I think you do have a story to tell, maybe to college and high school kids.  Really.  Your story would scare the living hell out of most kids….

 

My reaction and response:  Ted brings up a few points that I’d like to address.  No doubt, alcohol played the biggest role in my falling 14 floors.  Sometimes I would be at Helen Hayes Hospital and see others with far more debilitating injuries, who simply fell while walking or who got injured on the job.  Most of their injuries were through no fault of their own, and I always thought how unfair it was that I ended up in better shape than these individuals.  My story is a remarkable one, and I always have the ears of anyone who listens to it.  The really amazing stories are the ones of those very individuals I met at Helen Hayes, who ended up going home and taking care of their families and were able to live fulfilling lives even after suffering a devastating injury that wasn’t their fault.

I’d be a total hypocrite to say that my partying days are over.  I’ve thought about talking with large groups of students about the dangers of “partying too hard.“  There is no way that I could get in front of an audience of college and/or high school kids and directly state something like, “stay away from alcohol.”  What Ted brings up here though, is that my story alone, told in all its gore, would scare a lot of people into being more careful when they party.  A few obvious tips like “be careful out there,” and “always use a designated driver,” should drive the point home.  I really haven’t touched on just how hellish each and every day was for those 1 ½ years.  I guess, up to this point, a lot has been left up to everyone’s imagination.  A description of an average day in the ICU would make a Stephen King novel look like a Disney vacation.  The next few parts in my series will get into some of these moments.

In all seriousness, at my age, I see a lot of friends who have young children.  In many of the letters I received, parents could not boast enough about how excited they were about having children.  The biggest favor I can do anyone, is to let parents share my story with their kids.  I couldn’t even imagine what it would be like to get a call like the one my parents got when I first landed in the emergency room.  I still cringe when I think about it.  When your children get a little older, be sure to share my narrative with them.

Reaction and response from Brian Gelbman:  Eugene, thanks for sharing your incredible story. It’s hard for anyone to imagine what you went through, but your honest writing gives the reader a better understanding... and an appreciation for life.

My reaction and response:  Thanks for the kind words.  If there is ever a book written about me, you can be sure I’ll use Brian’s statement on the back cover.

I try to be honest in my writing.  It’s the only way I can convey to the reader any semblance of the gravity of my situation.  Not just regarding what happened, but also what life is like today.  I always hope I give the audience a better “appreciation for life.”

I’d be lying if I was to say that I am an upbeat and positive person myself.  Not always true.  In fact, writing and sharing my experience has helped ME more than it has anybody else.  As close friends can attest, I was feeling somewhat depressed before I wrote the first installment for the A Letter a Week website.  Writing the story forced me to recall a lot of what happened when I was in the hospital.  Repressing those memories made me disconnect with how lucky I am just to have made it home.  For a while the doctors were thinking I might be forced into a nursing home, or in worst case, hospice care.  Things were getting pretty desperate.  Writing and being able to share the story indeed helped ME appreciate life more.

On that score, I’d like to thank Scott Riecke for taking interest in, and subsequently for posting my story.  I’d also like to thank those of you who have read, and hopefully will continue to read, my series here at A Letter a Week.  Thank you for all the letters, emails, and messages responding to Part I.  It’s been a most positive experience!  Part II, a view of my hospital bed through the eyes of shocked family and friends, will be coming soon.

 

 

To read the original letter, please click here.

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